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Monday, September 5, 2011

Can you say avoidance?

Avoidance is my middle name these days.  In fact, I wrote that sentence and paused to watch reality tv for a full 5 minutes before coming back to the post.  What am I avoiding?  My blog.  Why am I avoiding my blog?  Because I feel like an utter weight loss failure.  I realized I am successful at losing and gaining the same 20lbs for the past 20.5 months. 

I am on a gaining cycle right now.  That 16lbs that I lost has been gained back in the past month.  Why?  I would love to blame it on my sister, who, since staying with us for the past 5 weeks has brought every type of cookie, cake, ice cream and bad habit into my house.  But she just brought the temptation, I am the one who gave in.  I knew I was gaining, but avoided the scale.  Instead, I went back to old habits of daily fast food breakfast, diet coke instead of water and an uncontrollable desire for sweets.  I have had some good days mixed in, but not enough to make a difference. 

So today I confess my sins and tomorrow I wake up with a clean slate.  Steel cut oats are cooked and packed up for tomorrow's breakfast, as well as a beans and greens soup and salad for lunch.  The Bodybugg is charged and the workout clothes are packed.  I am planning on going back to Slimmons tomorrow night.  I have been gone for a few weeks due to work schedule.  I am also joining the gym at my work and will be doing early morning workouts on the off Slimmons days.  Tomorrow, will also be a weigh in day for me just so I have a starting point using my scale.  No more of the weight loss management program weigh ins, so now it is time to start tracking on my own scale.

Here I go again.

7 comments:

  1. You can do this!! You have a great start already set up with your foods, and your plan! Those cakes, cookies, and ice cream are just a temporary satisfaction, losing these 20 lbs for good will be a lasting effect!! Stay strong!

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  2. Something that REALLY helps me to stay accountable is blogging every day. If I'm blogging fairly often, I do fairly well, if I'm blogging every day, then I hardly ever give in to temptation, because I know I'm going to have to confess it. If I'm not blogging much at all? Well, my efforts are shot. Just a suggestion. Good luck this time :)

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  3. I feel your pain as I read your post. The avoiding does have to stop, and you reconizing it means your there to stop it and move on...Take it one day at a time one meal at a time. You can do this..first getting the sugar out of your diet and getting the cravings stopped will be a great start...Make small reachable goals..I am behins you and can't wait to see your results in the coming week...Think positive YOU CAN DO IT!!!!
    Hugs,
    Jolyn

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  4. You have to set some concrete goals that you will complete. Make a workout calendar for September with what you know you can accomplish in the next 4 weeks. One day at a time is great advice - but then it's easy to say 'I'll start tomorrow'. Make a little plan for September and post it here! :) Can't wait to read it.

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  5. Oh, honey.

    I'm so sorry about the gain cycle. Heaven knows I have been there. It's ESPECIALLY hard when you have a house guest sabotaging. I think we may have spoken before about my experience this year with a sabotaging house guest bringing in cookies, cheesecake and ice cream. I hadn't had any of those things all year until this person brought them in, and when they're there, they are VERY VERY hard to say no to. That's why I hadn't brought them in myself. Sweets are my weak spot, and if I have something highly caloric and sweet, then I want two. If I have two, then three. If you give a mouse a cookie...

    What can we do to help support you? I can't wait to see you at Slimmons tonight. But aside from that, do you need anything? Somebody to regularly check in with? Please know that I'm here and I've been right where you are.

    Also, I think some closet playtime is in order.

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  6. I am right there with you, Patty. This crap should be A LOT easier. I am rooting for you though!

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  7. Weight loss is hard... for all of us. So you have nothing to be ashamed about :)

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