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Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Small Changes

Small changes have been put into motion.  Last night I managed to get Holly to sleep in record time and was able to slide out of bed and get a workout in.  I used my kettle ball for the first time and loved it.  I worked the arms and legs.  I can feel it in my legs today. (Those squats get me every time.)  Tonight, I will use my stability ball and do some ab work. 

Oh, and this is my little super model....

Tuesday, December 28, 2010

Weigh In Week 6

Last Weight:  322.4
Current Weight:  323.4
Total Gain:  1 lbs

Not as bad as I thought but not good considering I have been "at this" for 6 weeks now.  I didn't make my first mini goal of -10lbs by week 4, and I am no longer on track of -1.78 lbs average per week.  It is time to kick it into high gear.  (Haven't I said that before?)

Monday, December 27, 2010


BALANCE is something I struggle with on a daily basis and have written about a lot in my old blog.  It is the underlying theme of my life.  I truly believe that if I can find the right balance of home, health, career and personal time, then I would be a happier, healthier and overall better person.  Wouldn't we all?

The big question is how am I going to achieve the perfect balance to make me a successful person in all areas of my life?  I have no idea.  I know that it won't happen overnight, over a few months, or even over the course of one year.  I know that it will take small changes, one at a time.  Developing a realistic routine and sticking with it.  I will also have to do something about my butt being super glued to this couch.  I am beginning to realize how lazy I am when I am at home.  I am embarrassed and disgusted by it.  My husband is even starting to mention it.  He never notices anything and if he does notice, he doesn't usually say anything.  So the fact that he is bringing it up, it must be bad.

I think the first small change I need to make is to get my butt off the couch.  On days off, when I come home from work, my home base is couch.  I will make a strong effort to avoid the couch and keep myself moving.  Whether I am doing evening chores, playing with Holly or getting her settled to bed, I will keep myself busy until there is nothing left for me to do, but relax and enjoy the evening.

Let's see how this goes.....

Monday, December 20, 2010

Weigh In Day

Another week, another weigh in. 

Last Weight:  326.2
Current Weight:  322.4
Loss: -3.8lbs

I would like to say soup and salad week paid off, but I forgot this was my holiday party week and I could only enjoy my soup and salad in between social engagements.  I really do have to check my social calendar before I declare a dedicated diet.  LOL!

I haven't had any formal exercise sessions, however, I have been walking around like mad, Christmas shopping, running around campus for meetings, climbing stairs, etc. 

It was an overall good week.

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

My baby is a year old today

Little Holly Hanna, my baby, my toddler, is a year old today.  I find this impossible to believe.  It  was just yesterday I squirted this little bundle from my loins. 

And now she is a walking, talking (like Chewbacca), little stinker who is kinda eating normal food (She only had 1.5 teeth.) 

A year later, I am still a sleep deprived, Zombie Mom, who can barely remember what I did 5 minutes ago, but she makes me smile no matter how tired, cranky or covered in poop I seem to be.  I do have to say, thank you inventor gods, for binkies.

If you want to reminisce the day of her birth with me you are welcome to read 3 posts of gory birth story details and 1 post of after delivery recovery gore, you can go to my other, other blog, what it is like to be fat and pregnant, but no one knows it because you are too fat and thinks you may be the devil for attempting to get pregnant because you are fat and can't possibly have a healthy pregnancy because you are so fat, Tales of a Plus Size Pregnancy


Monday, December 13, 2010

A few pictures

I received a new camera for my birthday, and I got a new Droid X phone for work.  So expect to see lots of random pictures on my blog.

Today's Lunch:  Salad bar, fresh fruit cup and water

Who is this foxy chick with an even more gorgeous baby?  Well, that is me of course and little Holly!

Holly wearing a beret in honor of the passing of ReRun from What's Happening?  Which, I learned about a week or so ago.  (Thanks again, Taryn, for sharing the news....) 

WI - Week 4

Yesterday was my 34th birthday.  Yay!  It was not as fun as I had hoped.  The husband was being a bit of a jackass and Holly was cranky because she is teething.  But, hey, it can't always be perfect, right?  I did go out at around 7pm and bought myself a birthday cake.  It was gorgeous and only $14.  I loved it so much, I didn't even eat it.  LOL!  I think Holly will have a similar cake for her birthday tomorrow.  (Will post a picture later tonight.)

This week was challenging, food and exercise wise.  Why you ask?  Well my sister arrived in Los Angeles on Wednesday to start her month long visit.  As always, her first week of visits means lots of eating out or comfort meals made at home.  I will honestly tell you that I had a terrible week of eating.  I tried my best to keep portions in control, which I think I did okay on.  The problem was the quality or type of foods we were feasting on.  Because she was here, (free babysitting), I was able to take advantage and stay at work late to get some things wrapped up before the holidays.  So exercise was nil. 

On the flip side, I am so sick of these heavy, unhealthy meals, that I declared this week, soup and salad week at home.  I need some raw fruits and veggies, salads and brothy soups to cleanse my system of all these toxins.  I feel dirty inside, if that makes any sense at all.

So, down to the point of the post - Weigh In.  I am supposed to weigh in on Saturday, however, I am also participating in a challenge with one of my Sparkpeople teams and they weigh in on Monday's.  I decided until this challenge is over, I will WI on Monday's. 

Starting Weight:  327.4
Last Weigh In:  323.6
Current Weigh In:  326.2
Gain:  2.6lbs

Two weeks in a row I have posted a gain.  NOT GOOD! 
I was also supposed to have achieved my mini goal this week of -10lbs.  Also, NOT GOOD as I am almost back at my original starting weight.  Uhhhhh.......

What do I have to say for myself?  I let emotional eating take over.  I let comfort eating take over.  I didn't get on the exercise bandwagon except for maybe 3 days these past two weeks.  I am slipping into my usual pattern where I let emotions, stress, and exhaustion dictate how I feed or care for myself.  I can't do that anymore.  I am better and stronger than that.

So what will I do differently this week?  More fresh fruits, veggies, salads, home made dressings, home made soups, etc.  I have a free babysitter for the next three weeks, so I am going to take advantage of it.  Not so I can stay at the office longer, but so I can hit the gym and get my butt moving.  No more sweets, because when I eat them I do bad, bad things.  LOL!

Because of the lack of birthday yesterday, my sister and I are going out tonight to celebrate.  We are going to the movies and dinner.  I know the place we are going to dinner posts nutritional info online so I can choose my salad and soup in advance and not be tempted by the other menu options.  I don't eat at the movies, so I am not worried about that.  The popcorn doesn't appeal to me anymore and I will just buy a giant water bottle.

Ok, after a long rambling post, I guess this should finally come to an end because someone just walked into my office for a meeting.  :)

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Energy and Cravings

Holly woke me up at 2:30 am this morning.  I think she is starting to get her upper teeth.  Oh fun! But I did notice that I bounced out of bed once she fell back asleep (3:30am) and I have been moving ever since.  I never have an abundance of energy this early in the am usually.  I think it has to do with getting back on track with my eating.  What a world of difference.

In other news, I have been craving more fruits and veggies.  I think it has something to do with my new mind trick.  I am such a visual person.  If I see a commercial for a specific food, restaurants, people eating something that looks or smells good, I start to crave it and slowly get this overwhelming need to consume  have what I have seen.  So I thought that if I surrounded myself with visuals of fresh fruit and veggies that this power of suggestion would start working in my favor.  I took an advertisement I received in the mail from Target.  They have expanded their stores in CA to include a larger grocery section, without turning into a full "Super Target".  Well the ads have these beautiful pictures of super fresh fruits, veggies, etc.  I keep one on my fridge and in my living room.  I glance at them all the time and the next thing I know when I am hungry for a snack I find myself having cravings for grapes, or mandarin oranges.  It is great!

It is now 5am and time for my 2 hour nap before I have to get up again and get ready for work. 

Monday, December 6, 2010

WI Week 3 - Late

I am late with my weigh in this week.  I have been fighting the flu over the weekend and was bed ridden. 

I am now weighing in at 323.6, a gain of 2lbs.  I am not upset or worried.  Next WI- Week 4, this Saturday is my mini-goal of reaching 10lbs lost to date. I think with a little hard work and determination I can still make it.  I just hope my body can keep up. :)

Thursday, December 2, 2010

Big Distraction

Sorry I haven't been posting much this week.  I have been so distracted because we are seriously considering buying a house.  I have had mixed feelings all week, but am starting to come around to the idea.  I have been obsessed with doing mortgage research, scouting houses on line, etc.  I guess I am finally growing up.  No more fly by the seat of my pants, I have to settle down.  YIKES! 

Saturday, November 27, 2010

WI Week 2

Another loss! YES!  My new weight is 321.6, a 1.6lb loss.  A total of 5.8lbs in the past two weeks.  I have two weeks to go to meet my first mini-goal of -10lbs.  If I can get a loss on Thanksgiving week, I can do anything!  Woo Hoo!!

I was doubting myself yesterday, but I pulled it off.  I am so excited.  I am feeling alive :)
My plan for weight loss is not to overwhelm myself so much, as I have done in the past.  It was always go big or go home.  Well, big was too much to handle with a new baby, work, etc, so I ended up just going home (or hitting the couch is more like it.)  I am really trying to make this a new lifestyle, so small changes at a time.  Slow and steady will win the race.  I am feeling good and am right on track.

The goal for this new week is to start putting in the effort for exercise.  I have really been coasting these past two weeks, just trying to get my portions under control.  Now that I have done well in that area, I can start incorporating more exercise.  Last night we went out for a quick 30 minute walk and if we can convince my visiting sister-in-law to watch Holly today, Daniel and I will hit the gym for a while.  I can't believe I am actually excited to go to the gym.  Who am I???  LOL!

Here is the math update:  (This is my first time pasting my excel spreadsheet.  I hope it works.)

DateWeekCurrent Weight Lbs lost % of Loss Total Weight Loss To DateTotal % of Body Fat LostYTD Goals (lbs)Lbs Over / Under YTD GoalGoal LBS To LoseGoal Weekly Average Loss
11/13/2010Starting Weight327.40.000.00% 0.000.00%0.000.00192.41.78
11/20/2010Week 1323.2-4.20-1.28% -4.20-1.28%-1.782.42
11/27/2010Week 2321.6-1.60-0.50% -5.80-1.77%-3.562.24

Thursday, November 25, 2010

It's Thanksgibbing!!!

One year I decided to start pronouncing words as if a little 3 or 4 year old would.  Thanksgibbing came out one year and has stuck ever since.  Every year, I call my mom as soon as I wake up and in my  best little kid voice announce, very loudly... IT'S THANKSGIBBING!!! 

This was one heck of a great Thanksgiving.  This year I am most thankful for getting my mojo back.  I hope that doesn't sound too selfish or self centered.  I am thankful for the other stuff too, like my family, a healthy daughter, etc.  But I am really thankful I found my footing once again and am on the track to a healthier life.

As for our Thanksgiving activities:  My husband made an incredible meal (I made the stuffing and am on clean up duty.)  His sister is in town and she and I had a Twilight and New Moon marathon until my friend Hugo came over.  Then we went into over drive to get dinner ready and to sit down to a feast.

All week I have been reading about people's plan for Thanksgiving.  They would exercise in the am and after dinner, they would either prepare a super healthy meal, or if they didn't have control over preparation, they would watch portions.  I wasn't sure what I would do for exercise or about eating.  I would just wing it when the day came. 

For me, Thanksgiving dinner is about the classic meal my family has always prepared.  I wanted the same feast I have had for the past 33.9 years.  No skimping, no updating the recipes to a lighter/healthier version.  So, I enjoyed the classic meal, but I only had one plate and just a little bit of everything.  I filled my plate up first with all the veggie dishes then went for the heavier, richer foods.  I had the one serving, but could have eaten seconds. (I ate only a bagel in the morning and was starving.)  But I didn't.  Instead, I got up and started cleaning.  I felt good.  I was proud of myself.  For the first time, I was satisfied after the meal and could still move around and had energy.  It was amazing.  Later of course, I did enjoy two slices of pie... one of each flavor.  But I really think that would be it for the pie.  I got my fix and really have no desire for anymore.  Now, if it was chocolate cake or brownies, this would be a totally different post.

While I am proud of my choices and my self control, I didn't have a great food week.  My portions have been great, but some of my choice of food have been less than stellar.  Chicken salad sandwich, small bag of potato chips, 2 slices of pizza, M&M's, etc.  It hasn't been 100% bad though.  Lunch have been a small soup and salad, double fiber English muffin for breakfast, raisin bran, etc.  Exercise has been severely lacking too.  Not because I didn't want to but because of the same old reason - just short on time.  Today I had plenty of time, I just wanted a day of rest after a crazy week.  I just hope it doesn't hurt me too much on the scale on Saturday morning.

Happy Thanksgiving to all!

Saturday, November 20, 2010

Week 1 Weigh In

Drum Roll, Please!

I weighed in this morning at 323.2, giving me a loss of 4.2 pounds and 1.28% of total weight loss. 
I am very grateful for the 4.2 pound loss, however, I have been weighing myself everyday like a naughty little girl and know that I weighed 321 yesterday, but whatever!  I still lost a lot, and it was 2.42 pounds more than my weekly goal of 1.78lbs. I am ahead of schedule.  Woo Hoo!!

I do have a confession though, I fell quickly off the soda wagon.  I had a total of three sodas between Thursday and Friday.  Damn, you Diet Coke, why can't I quit you??  Well, I can and I will start fresh again today.  Why did I fall off the wagon?  Was I going through withdrawals?  No, not really.  I was feeling really tired one morning and before I knew it I was on autopilot driving through McD's to get my egg mcmuffin and standard diet coke.  I honestly wasn't thinking.  Since I failed that morning, I allowed myself one in the afternoon.  And then again yesterday during lunch.  It didn't make me fell better, or was truly amazing, just convenient.   So, I came home from work last night and made a big pitcher of autumn pumpkin spice iced tea and drank that the rest of the night.

Today, it is actually raining in LA.  Holly and I were planning to go for a walk down to the bank but I guess we will have to drive on our way to the mall to pick up her Christmas pictures.  I think we will be mall walking and doing a little window shopping.  We need to get some idea of what Santa needs to bring Daddy for Christmas. 

I hope you all have a wonderful day planned :) 
Happy Saturday!! 

A must see!

One of my favorite bloggers, Brittany at Deliciously Healthly made a wicked apple turnover for Thanksgiving in lieu of the traditional apple pie.  She saved half the calories, but not half the flavor.  You have to check out this recipe.  I will be making it for my husband, Daniel.  He is an apple pie fanatic.

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Blisters and freckle rashes, oh my!

First I wanted to say thank you to everyone for all the nice comments.  I just realized that I wasn't getting the email notifications of the comments and they were being published direct.  I didn't know you guys were reading and commenting.  LOL!  I just went back and read all the words of encouragement and great tips.  Thanks so much to you all.  You really do make a difference when you post comments.  I can't tell you how excited I get when I get a comment, or how much it encourages me to continue.  Yay readers! :) 

More info on the Body Bugg blister front...  Thanks to Katie J for giving me some insight.  I do wear the large band, wash it regularly.  The band isn't giving me the blisters, it is the section where the electronic device is pressed against my skin. The device has these little sensor bumps behind it that rubs against the skin and I think those are the sections I am getting these blisters.  I did notice a few times over the weekend it would slip off, so I am not sure that it is too tight either but will definitely adjust to see if it helps.  The only other thing I can think of is my skin sensitivity.  I have what my childhood pediatrician so technically put it, have a "freckle rash".  (Stacy, does that bring back memories or what? LOL).  What is a freckle rash you might ask?  Well, I have super fair skin that is trying to freckle.  The pigment rises to the surface but can't freckle because I don't get enough sunlight.  So instead it forms these little pink/red bumps.  I think these bumps are getting irritated and forming the blisters.  Or it may just be sweat and the combination of the sensor rubbing on the skin while moist is causing the blister?  Not sure, but Katie suggested I join the Body Bugg Facebook group and post the question there.  So I think I will.  I tried to take some pics to share with you, but they came out too blurry.  Will have the hubby take some pics so you can see what I am talking about.  (That is, if the pics are not too gross... LOL)

In other news.... I think the only veggies I consumed yesterday were on my turkey sandwich. :(  I worked late and had a quick bowl of whole wheat pasta and meat sauce when I got home for dinner.  I was too tired to make a salad to go with it.  Tomorrow, I am going to push the fruit and veggies.  In fact, since it is quiet at this 2:00am hour, I am going to prepare my breakfast and lunch for tomorrow.  I also had a very sedentary day yesterday.  If I can get home a decent hour tomorrow night, I think we will go on a family walk.  Holly needs the fresh air and mommy needs the workout.  I couldn't tonight.  I had such a crappy day, that by the time I got home it was 8pm and the only thing at that point that would pull me out of my bad mood was my baby girl and a little Glee.  Didn't get to enjoy much of the Glee, but baby girl was entertaining enough.  Lucky for me, I have DVR so I can still get my Glee on later. ;)

Have a happy and healthy day everyone!

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Hold the cheese?

I just went downstairs for lunch to order my usual sandwich.  I made a bold step today by not adding cheese to my usual turkey, whole wheat bread combo.  Yes, me!  I love cheese and I am not giving it up but am trying to cut back.  I am proud of my little step in the right direction.

I am also still soda free.  I lost count how many days it has been, but still soda sober.  I don't miss it nor do I think about it. This time around giving it up has been so effortless.  Which is weird, because I am still just as tired, stressed, overworked, exhausted, insert additional excuses I gave in the past here, but no need to run to the diet cola. 

My new issue is my Body Bugg.  I have been wearing it and doing great with tracking my calories counts.  The one problem I have is it still gives me blisters on my arms.  I will have to check in Katie J or Jewlia Goulia to see if they had this problem as well and if so, how they dealt with it.  So due to blisters I will not be wearing my bugg today.  :( 

Must get back to work, lunch break is over.  Hope you are all having a happy and healthy day :)


Sunday, November 14, 2010

The Math, Goals and Rewards

I had my official starting weigh in today, 327.4.  This was expected.  I am actually happy it is not more than 330.  I weighed myself 3 times and this number came up twice.  (I really need to get this scale situation rectified.)

  • Lbs needed to lose in order to reach goal of 135 by 12/12/12 = 192.4 
  • Average weekly number of pounds to lose in order to reach goal = 1.78 
  • Number of weekly weigh in between now and 12/12/12 = 108
I can't believe I have to lose the equivalent of an obese person to make it to goal.  How did I let it get this far?  192.4lbs really??  I am sickened.  I totally have my work cut out for me.  But, let's look on the bright side, my goal is realistic to the point it will only take an average of 1.78lbs per week to make goal, which puts me in that recommended 1-2lb a week range.  Woo Hoo!

These are mini goals I would like to set for myself.  They are above the average 1.78lb weekly average, which should motivate me to work a little harder.  I don't want to get too far ahead of myself so I have posted three for the time being.
  • Down 10lbs by 12/11/10, week 4. 
  • Lose 28.4lbs, which would put me under 300 by 1/22/11, week 10. 
  • 10% of body weight or 32.74lbs by 2/26/11, week 15.
I have been having a hard time figuring out a reward system.  I finally settled on $5 for each lb lost to be transferred to a special weight loss project savings account.  That way I can build up a little nest egg for anything special I want to buy for myself. 

It's on!

Saturday, November 13, 2010

Vegan Hipster for a Day

Good Morning Everyone :)
I seem to have the most peace and quiet at this 3:30am time slot.  I am starting to not mind waking up for this period in the middle of the night so I can catch up on blogs and write my own.  Plus, I have developed a strange addiction to reruns of Who's The Boss on the Hallmark channel.  My body alarm wakes me up in time to play online and settle in by 4am to watch a couple episodes before falling back into dream land. 

TV is one vice I would probably never give up.  Soda on the other hand... 2 days soda sober, thank you. 

My friend from work is a vegan and knows all the great vegan restaurants in LA.  I have been wanting to try them out, so we finally escaped work together and had a great lunch off campus.  She took me to a great Thai Vegan restaurant in LA with lots of hipsters and ultra cool LA people.  (In their opinion of course .. I am cool in my own off beat, odd ball way. LOL)  The food was great.  I had brown rice, mixed vegetables, vegan chicken and a side salad with some sort of carrot and ginger dressing.  The sauces and dressing were so flavorful and delicious but not over powering that it hid the taste of the veggies.  It had a great contrast of sweet and savory between the dressing and the light sauce on the veggies. YUMMO!  The vegan chicken was not bad at all.  The texture looked like chicken and it adapted the flavor of the sauce in the veggies.  I would try it again.  I also tried one of her vegan chicken wings.  Woo, boy, spicy and good!  Looked exactly like a chicken wing and tasted great.  Too spicy for me though. I could only eat one.  I will be going back, but I need the right outfit to mix in with the locals.  Maybe some punk hair, black Hello Kitty  t-shirt and skinny jeans with some hot pink flats.  LOL!

I stopped at Kohl's on my way home from work last night to pick up a new scale.  (Side note:  No one told me how amazing Kohl's is.  This was my first trip and I instantly became a fan.)  I was on my way to Target and saw Kohl's and thought I would give it a shot.  I found a nice scale, $50 on sale for $20.  I figured I couldn't go wrong.  I even took it out of the box there at the store and tried it out before purchasing.  I got on and off it 3 times in a row and it weighed the same each time.  I thought I had finally hit the jackpot.  I got it home and have not had the same reading in a row yet.  I have been on and off that thing 100 times tonight.  I am so frustrated.  I am going to go back to using my old scale for now until I can find the right one.  I really don't want to spend an arm and a leg on a scale.  I just want one that I feel would be consistent from one weigh in to the next.  These others fluctuate so much there is no telling how much weight I really lost or gained. So the saga shall continue.

So the official starting weigh in will occur later this morning when I wake up to officially start my day.  I will have a whole post dedicated to the weigh in, my goals, rewards, etc.  I am so looking forward to it.  (Did I really type that?)

Friday, November 12, 2010

Soda and Scales

Day 1 of being soda free was surprisingly super easy, and cheaper.  I saved a whole dollar at lunch time.  Woo Hoo! I didn't have any headaches either.  I hope my quest continues to go this smoothly.

Eating has been good too.  I measured out my cereal and milk in the morning, had a sensible lunch of turkey on whole wheat and baked lays and home made chinese for dinner.  I have been trying out new food trackers online since I am still having trouble accessing from work.  I haven't found one I like or found as easy as Spark.  I have a feeling I might just stick to Sparkpeople and enter my food at the end of the day or once I get my Droid phone up a going on Friday, use the Spark app to track at work.

My next challenge is to find a good scale.  I got rid of the one I used to have and bought a Biggest Loser scale from QVC.  It is the worst scale I have ever had.  I get a dramatically different weight each time I step on within 1 minute.  So I am now in the market for a new scale.  I am going to go back to some of the blog archives and see with our other WL bloggers are using.  I would love to be able to buy one this weekend so I can start tracking the weight loss immediately.

All in all, a great first day of clean, healthy living. 

Wednesday, November 10, 2010


Welcome to the reinvention of me.  Welcome to the re dedication to me.  Welcome to my new blog. 

I had an epiphany in the shower this morning.  I am ready to tackle this weight once and for all.  The ideas were flowing in between lathering, rinsing and repeating.  I want to lose weight. I want to see 135lbs.  I want to do it by my 36th birthday, December 12, 2012.  Yup - 12-12-12.  That gives me a little over two years to get there.  I was so excited because it felt like a realistic goal.  I even had a name for the new blog come to me in an flash - 136 by 36.  It was so cute, but unfortunately for me, already taken.  So I had to settle on 135 by 2012. 

I am still figuring out the rules and mini goals and rewards.  But rest assured, I am going to do this.  I look forward to this new chapter in my life.  I can't wait to share it with you.  Stay tuned for more exciting updates. :)

Take Care,